18 Steps to Living Your Best Life
Why do we have compassion for other people, but not ourselves?
When did you become second to everything else around you?
In order to be the best you, you need to be selfish and start worrying about yourself first. You need to start focusing on SELF LOVE. In order to give your all in a relationship, as a parent, or in life in general, you need to first be whole yourself.
How often do you go back and replay a scenario in your head?
What if I did this?
What if I did that?
You are going to drive yourself crazy!! You need to forgive yourself for the mistakes you made in life and learn from them. The greatest lesson in life is learning from your mistakes. You are human! Mistakes happen!! Analyze the situation, figure out why the situation occurred, how your reaction to the situation should have been changed, and how to become a better you.
Forgive Other People
Sometimes people do things that are mean and cruel. But, being angry about their behaviors only harms you.
Forgiving and forgetting are two different things. You can forgive someone for the harm they caused you, but never associate with that person again because you didn’t forget what they did. It is important to remember that you cannot change people. They are responsible for their own behaviors. Just like how you are responsible for yours.
Holding in that anger or resentment will only hurt you over time. Being angry and resenting takes a lot of energy. So forgive them so you can be a healthy version of you.
End Toxic Relationships
Any toxic relationship that you are currently in needs to end NOW! That relationship is infringing on, not only your spiritual and mental health, but ultimately your physical health.
Sometimes it is hard to leave a toxic relationship. For example, your boss might be a very toxic person and constantly talk down to you, but financially you can’t leave because you have bills to pay or children you need to put food on the table for. I get it! But either look for a different job or put serious boundaries up and remember that however someone speaks to you is a reflection of how they feel on the inside.
Eating healthy is one of the best things you can do for self-care. Fueling your body and every cell of your body with nutritious, healthy substances will benefit you long term! Have you ever ate a Big Mac and afterwards felt disgusting. Everyone has felt that way at some point. Not fun right. Eat to live, don’t live to eat.
Not only does exercise help with stress management, but it just makes you feel good! Exercise does not have to be an hour at the gym or running five miles a day. Exercise can be taking a nice walk down the block or doing some squats/lunges/pushup combo in your home when the kids go to sleep. Everyone’s definition of exercise is different. You need to do what feels right to you!
Follow Your Dreams
If you follow your dreams, you will spend every day of your life happy.
If you do what you love, you never work a day in your life.
So, follow your dreams and follow you heart. When I was younger, everyone had an opinion of what career I should pursue. Everyone! And guess what they were all wrong! I became a social worker because I LOVE helping people. And I became a chiropractor because I LOVE helping people and LOVE the human body. You have to do what you LOVE!! Spending everyday wishing you were doing something sucks. Don’t regret not following you dreams. You are in control of your life!
It Is Okay To Say NO
So I am here to tell you that it is 100% okay to tell someone “NO!”
Actually, it is really healthy to have boundaries. Many people go through life without boundaries! Boundaries are what keep you sane and everyone else around you respecting you, so say no if you do not want to do something. This was something that was really hard for me. I had to put on a post it note “It is okay to say NO” and constantly look at it until I was able to grasp the concept and respect my own energy, time, space, and self-worth.
If you feel uncomfortable about something, say no. if you do not want to do something, say no. It is okay to be selfish sometimes!
Speak Your Thoughts
Your thoughts are important.
Let me say that again.
YOUR THOUGHTS ARE IMPORTANT!
Many people never speak their thoughts, but if everyone did that, we would not have electricity, cars, cell phones, internet, etc.
Amazing things happen because one person had the courage to act on their thought and develop something fantastic. Your thoughts are amazing! Just make sure they are productive, positive, and sincere.
Once our thoughts and feelings get written on a piece of paper, somehow this sense of relief comes over and that thing that was bothering you is no longer bothering you! At that moment, you can curse, yell (through words) and state how you really feel about someone.
Holding onto anger and resentment can kill you or take years off your life. Don’t hold onto anger and resentment. Find a healthy outlet to release those negative emotions.
People forget to be thankful for what they have.
Bad thoughts always seem to overpower the good.
You woke up today! Isn’t that amazing?! Do you know how many people did not wake up today?
It takes a while to get into the groove of constantly thanking the Universe/God/higher power for the little things you have, but work on it. You will see that your outlook on life will change for the better.
Master Time Management
Time is valuable.
Make a list and plan out your schedule the night before.
You are more productive when you are able to manage your time properly. It is also good for your mental health! Being flustered or worried about what the future holds is not healthy.
Breathing is so important. It is the basis of life.
If you didn’t breathe, you wouldn’t be reading this.
Breathing right before you are about to respond to something is extremely important. It gives you a second to make sure what you want to say is sincere, positive, and not being said out of anger.
Saying anything out of anger is always a bad idea.
You cannot see through boiling water, so do not say anything when you are angry. Breathe!!! Then address whatever situation you are put in.
Release Negative Energy
Have you ever walked into a room and felt this draining/blah feeling? That is negative energy.
Have you ever walked into a room and instantly felt a sense of happiness? That is positive energy.
Which one felt better?
Positive energy right?!
So why would you want to feel drained and blah when you already know what amazing feels like?
Release Unwanted/Negative Thoughts
Just get rid of them! Let them go! Write them down in your journal. Change them to an affirmation. Just let them go! You will never be happy as long as you hold onto unwanted/negative thoughts.
Thoughts become things!
Do not, I repeat, do not pretend to be someone or something that you are not.
You are perfect just the way you are. You do not need to change for anyone.
If you feel you need to change in order for that person to like you, then they are the wrong person for you.
Your time, energy, and love is valuable. Remember that!
Surround Yourself With Like-Minded People
Have you ever heard the saying “who you hang out with is who you become”. It is true!
If you surround yourself with small minded thinkers, you will never be able to pursue bigger goals.
Find your tribe. Latch arms and conquer the world together. If you have dreams of becoming a successful billionaire, then surround yourself with people who are already billionaires or on their way to be.
I LOVE meditation! Meditation is good for basically everything! And the best part is, you can mediate anywhere. All you need to do is clear your mind.
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Self Compassion LLC offers ONLINE LIFE COACHING. You deserve the space to talk about life challenges without judgement. Dr. Jessica helps you break generational patterns and consciously create a new version of yourself.
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